(Part: 18) Lost Love (The Most Awaited Part)
“She is living in hell, I don’t know what they would be doing with her.” He uttered dejectedly.
“It was a fine day, we got ready to visit amusement part with our parents” I was a bit relieved because he was sharing his pain with me. I had been waiting for this day since so long. Maybe now I could help him.
“We were enjoying a lot there, but we never thought that everything was going to end. Our life was going to change and our dreams were going to crush brutally.” With each and every word, my breath was becoming heavy and my heartbeat was accelerating. I was staring at him without even blinking my eyes.
“That day we both were kidnapped by a few groups of people. I thought, they kidnapped us for money but it was something else. They kidnapped us to beg at the red light and earn money for them. They beat us, they beat her badly in front of my eyes and I cried, seeing her in pain. She also cried a lot and always asked me to make an escape plan. She always said ‘Sidu, Mummy daddy will be waiting for us, I miss them so much. Please do something.” He squeezed his eyes shut and cried in agony.
I was also crying, seeing him in pain and thinking that how much pain he had endured in his life. His past was worst than a nightmare.
“A year passed and we suffered together there, but finally one day we escaped out. Nandu was so happy, I was equally happy, but in a midway, her leg got struck. Goons were following us, Nandu begged me to run, so that I bring police and save her too. I was not ready to leave her alone in the hell. But I had no other option because if we both were caught then nobody would have ever found us. I left her alone there and hid behind the pillar. In front of eyes, they took Nandita with them putting her in the car and I kept seeing her going away from me.” I became numb after listening to his story. So this was the reason, he was blaming himself and hurting himself because he wanted to punish himself for leaving her alone there.
Sidharth slumped down on floor, he became hysterical and began crying mechanically in agony. I cried too.
“I left her there to suffer alone, I was so selfish. I escaped out, leaving her alone in the hell. I can’t even imagine what must be her condition. I had promised her that I would come back to save her, but I haven’t found her yet because I have no clue about her. I did a very big mistake by leaving her alone there. More than the pain, the guilt of leaving her alone is killing me.” He was crying constantly while sharing his pain with me. I was also crying lying down on the bed badly seeing his condition. I composed myself and climbed down from the bed because it was not the right time to cry for me, I had to console him.
I knelt down beside him. “Sidharth.” My voice cracked as I called him. He looked at me helplessly, having so much pain in his eyes. His eyes were begging me to help him. It seemed like he was craving to come out from the pain and loneliness. He just wanted someone to help him. He was in guilt which he wanted to come out, but it was difficult. It was not easy for him to forgive himself, I was understanding his condition very well.
Next moment, I just pulled him into my arms and hugged him firmly. He cried more badly, making sound and hugged me back tighter. He was crying, I was crying and outside, the sky was also crying because it was raining outside, I could hear the voice of rain. I was letting him cry because the pain he was storing inside his heart, that pain needed to come out. It was getting so difficult for me to hear his howls and screams of anguish. That time I was just praying to God for his happiness.
After a few minutes, when I couldn’t able to bear his screams, I broke the hug.
“Please, Sidharth, stop crying. It was not your fault.” I clasped his face with my both hands. “I know it is difficult for you to accept that it was not your fault because you yourself left her alone there. But you need to understand that you just became the medium, it was god wish.” He looked at me helplessly, having tears in his eyes as I said those words.
“Please, help me, Shehnaaz, please. This pain is killing me, I am dying. Please help.” He begged and held my hands which was kept on his face. I sobbed, looking at him but felt a bit relief because he was finally asking me to help him. Finally, he was giving a chance to his life and to me. That moment I got a hope to help him because now he himself was ready to come out of the pain and guilt. He just needed my support and my help which was always there. Now no power could stop him from coming out of the pain and guilt.
“I am with you, everything will get better. Just trust me.” I assured him, caressing his cheeks constantly with my thumbs and as a small baby, he was looking at me for help.
“Just trust me.” I murmured after touching my forehead with his forehead. I closed my eyes and got lost in him. He got lost in me too because he wasn’t crying. I was just feeling his hot breath caressing my face. His one hand was still holding my hand which was on his face, and he drove his other hand into my hair. That moment was so peaceful for me, I myself never felt so peaceful with anybody before.
Few minutes had been passed, and we moved a little away from each other. His condition was looking better. He was gazing at me in utter disbelief like he was trying to believe I was real or not. I just gave him vague smile. I stood up and also helped him to get up by holding his shoulder and arms. I strolled toward the sofa which was kept in the room and he was just gazing at me incredulously. I made him sit on the sofa and filled the glass with water from the jar which was kept on the table. I held out the glass of water before him, but he didn’t take it because he was lost in gazing at me.
“Sidharth…” As I called him, he took the glass from me and kept back on the table after taking a small sip, his incredulous gaze was fixed at me.
“Are you in real?” He asked by holding my hand as I turned to walk toward my bed. As he grasped my hand, my breath became heavy. I had no control over my feelings of love. I had promised him that I would not let him and even myself to cross the limit of friendship, but it was going to be very difficult for me to keep the promise.
Before I could turn, I felt him standing behind me still holding my hand. My breath became heavier and my heartbeat quickened. I closed my eyes and then he turned me toward himself. As I opened my eyes, I found him gazing at me intensely. He clasped my face and moved closer to my lips. I wanted to stop him but couldn’t because I was becoming weak in front of my feelings of love which were very strong. Like a magnet, his lips were attracting my lips. Our lips were just a few inches away, I could feel his warm breath over my lips which was making me insane. I was losing control over myself.
But before I could break my promise by crossing our limits of friendship, we startled by the voice of opening the door. We immediately pulled away from each other. I didn’t know I should have thanked God for stopping me on right time or I should have blamed god at that moment because he sent Cabir in the middle of our special moment. It was so complicated, I didn’t know for how long I was going to control my feelings.
“Shehnaaz, how are you?” Cabir strolled towards us.
“I am fine” I passed him a smile.
“Shehnaaz.” As Sidharth called me, I instantly looked at him.
“I should leave now, take care.” I nodded my head and he walked out of the room.
“So the plan worked or not?” As Cabir asked, I looked at him sadly. My accident was a plan to make Sidharth realise about his feeling. It was a lie that I met with the accident.
“Cabir, I don’t want to take Nandita’s place in his heart. I want to find her, the real happiness of his life is Nandita. She must be waiting for him and I can’t snatch her Sidu from her.” I uttered and closed my eyes dishearteningly, . Sometimes I hated myself for always being so good. Every time I thought about others before myself.
“Shehnaaz, I want to tell you something.” As he said, I opened my eyes.
“I really don’t think so Nandita is going to come back now. Sixteen years has been passed since he is finding her. I think now God has sent you for Sidharth. Accept the god’s wish and accept Sidharth. In fact, by doing this, you will help Nandita by giving happiness to love of his life. He needed love, Shehnaaz. He have been craving for love from so many years.” Cabir tried to make me understand that If I give love to Sidharth, it wouldn’t be wrong. Somewhere he was right because they had no clue about Nandita. It was impossible to find her without any clue. But the question was “will sidharth ever love me like the way he loves Nandita?”
So It is revealed where is Nandita.
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